Thursday, February 11, 2010

Satan's Minions Strike Again!

Another crisis in the former People's Republic of Kennedy's Seat as police seize not only a "cache" of weapons, but Instruments of the Dark Lord...from the Boston Globe:
Gregory D. Girard, 45, was arrested Tuesday night for allegedly storing several tear gas grenades and explosive pepper ball projectiles. He was also charged with the illegal possession of four police batons.
Just before 11:30 p.m. Tuesday, Manchester-by-the Sea police executed a search warrant at 23 Bridge St., police said in a statement. Girard faces four counts of possession of an infernal device and four counts of possession of a dangerous weapon. Additional charges are pending, police said.
Charged with "four counts of possession of an infernal device..." Wow! I wonder if the "device" in question was an Iron Maiden, as medieval torture devices were often referred to as "infernal devices."


Well, be that as it may, note also that this miscreant was also charged with illegal possession of four police batons." Police batons...aka sticks?

There are 3 important points to taken from this debacle:
1) Know the laws of your community! If it's illegal to possess a PR-24 or collapsable baton, tear gas or pepper gas cartridges, then DON'T POSSESS THEM! Especially when there are perfectly legal civilian alternatives.
2) If you're going to be a writer for even a dead-tree helpless pitiful giant like the Boston Globe, consider getting a dictionary, which will tell you that "infernal" is not a synonym for "incendiary."
3) You might as well get more guns and ammo, as anything more than 1 gun and 10 rounds of ammo is a "cache" and an arsenal.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

Maybe they are going to charge him with witchcraft. It could be just like Salem.

The accused has been cavorting with the Satan and his infernal devises, How do ye plead?

Matthew said...

"Infernal machine" was used as a term for explosive device as late as 1971 in mass (according to a quick google).

Maybe the writer conflated the charge with the more modern "device" label.

WV: dessed - the verb form you get when slang starts being conjugated

Louis said...

Google helps out with this one:
http://www.mass.gov/legis/laws/mgl/266-102a.htm

Some excerpts:
...infernal machine or a similar instrument, contrivance or device...
The term “infernal machine”, as used in this section, shall include any device for endangering life or doing unusual damage to property, or both, by fire or, explosion...

I'm not sure how they are claiming fire or explosion with gas grenades or pepper balls.

seeker_two said...

There seems to be a thin, blue line between police batons and "magical" broomsticks....he should have stayed with safer items like hatchets and bottled propane.....

Anonymous said...

Doing more research on this...it seems that his WIFE was the reason he was "Busted". They apparently have been having "Difficulties".

She was identified in one article as a "Psychiatrist"

YMMV

Overload in Colorado said...

Butterfly knives are illegal in Colorado.

Everyone breaks laws, knowlingly or not. There are so many laws that most are not enforced.

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